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I avoid labels when possible, but here goes: SWF, 40'ish, 20 year Navy veteran. I have an inner ham and her name is Ms. Piggy.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Movie review and confessions of a refugee from the dating world.

Eternal Sunshine Of the Spotless Mind was my Netflix selection tonight, I rate it 4 tissues! That's how I rate all movies now BTW. The record still stands at a tie of 12 tissues for Beautiful Boxer and for It's A Beautiful Life (no, I don't mean "It's A Wonderful Life", that's a different movie).
Of all Jim Carrey's 'playing against type' movies, I think I found this one the most believable; possibly because he didn't totally remove his comedic touch from the whole movie. Saying that now I realized it's an interesting coincidence considering the theme of the movie, which has to do with sanitizing memories. Kirsten Dunst could be total crap and I would still love her, so I can't really say how she was. Everyone else was great too, it was fun seeing Elijah Wood play a slimeball instead of a sweet hobbit! I always try to watch movies like this long after they come out so I'm not influenced by the hype or press that comes along with the initial release.
As to subject matter, I almost hated the movie because it comes at a time where I'm backing off from the dating world after a series of dissapointments and reevaluating my positions on things in general. I was forced to look at a practice I've engaged in almost every time dating relationships have gone sour; namely that I do my best to sanitize everything about the person from my memory and my life. Is this a common thing to do? It bothers me because it seems kind of childish, in a "I'm takin' all my marbles and going home" sorta way. It is like rewinding a tape, and writing over the past. When you take a really close look at it though, there are always tiny bits of the old that poke back through in spots, like ghosts.
One premise put forth in the movie is that you don't appreciate what you have in a relationship until it's gone. For me that seems total hooey. Whenever the situation became untenable I left, but it's always been all the more heartbreaking in the process because I can see what's being thrown away.
In the end of the movie (SPOILER ALERT), the couple each hear the other's taped admissions of what drove them away from each other; they ultimately decide to ignore that they will likely just make themselves hate each other again and we see them go off in blissful rediscovery. Do people really do this? Hasn't worked for me! When you can see that the other person just is the way they are and they aren't going to change, how can you keep on when you know you cannot live with that aspect of a person? Am I being stubborn, or sticking to my principles?
It's too Hollywood an ending I think, or am I just being sour? Love really does NOT conquer all; too often it just seems to make us stick around too long until we really get hurt.